One of the most amazing things about BRFs (Best Running Friends) are that they are just like best friends – you can pick up your pace and mile just where you left it the last time.
This weekend, Dawn, a BRF who moved away to Boston, came down to visit and run with us! She was so awesome in coming out to meet me early for a few solitary miles and then to hang on for a total of 12, even though she was only planning on 8. And also the Dopey boys, who both dragged themselves out in the chill just 2 weeks after their epic adventure!
Running Friends Rock!
Now onto the run itself.
The original plan was 16, but I knew logistics would prevent it and so opted for a quick 7 on Friday and a 12 on Saturday. My glutes and butt were still sore from meeting Curtis P. at Crossfit (100 Hang Clean, 100 Right Lunge, 100 Left Lunge, 100 Push Press) and the friday run was not the most fluid of runs. I still had the tightness in my hips and the soreness! Did I mention the soreness?
So when I ran today, I was … afraid. There is no other way to put it. I was afraid.
I was afraid of facing another wall like I’ve been facing these past runs beyond 10 miles.
I was afraid of another meltdown, especially knowing that I hadn’t had the best of sleeps for the past few days.
I was afraid of the mildly rolling hills.
I was afraid of running on concrete since I had not run on sidewalks since thanksgiving day.
I was afraid of …. an unnamed fear.
So I responded by the only way I knew – I ran slower. Slower than I was capable of. Slower than I knew I was capable of. Slower than what I have run the past 2 weeksn. I ran the miles, but I didn’t put my heart in it. I enjoyed running with my friends, but my mind was filled with fear.
The way out of this is in my mind. I know it is. Maybe my body is reacting to my mind overthinking (I am sure of it! I analyse a bit too much!). Maybe I need to back off on the miles and let my body catch up to running higher mileage. Maybe I am coming down with something (Its been almost 3 weeks that I’m free of any sickness. Think I’m overdue?)
Next week is a new week. And I am sure my miles will be different.
It is time for my mind to catch up to what my body can do. Mind over Body. And the mind needs to know that!
Have you ever been crippled my an unknown unnamed fear in your mind? How have you fought the voice in your head?
Leave a comment and I would love to know how you have conquered your fears.
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